Today, you are a man!

The Age of Responsibility

Dear Josiah, I rejoice with you! As we, as a family, celebrate your 13th birthday. You can't know how much you give us joy -- a deep emotional fulfillment that makes "happiness" look like a pale imitation. We see your heart -- for others, and for the Lord. Your character. And your gifts, also -- your quick mind, your skills on the playing field.

There is a danger in being gifted as God has gifted you. Here is a quote from a sermon given by Martin Luther on the third sunday after Trinity Sunday, 1533:

-- "There is in God's judgement, no greater sin than that pious men and women and virgins commit when they despise those who lie in their sin and would appropriate to themselves their natural gifts, puffing themselves up and despising their neighbor."

I see none of this pride in you, thank Him who gifted you! But as you grow older, and encounter many who will disappoint you or act incomprehensively, it is natural to develop (no matter how secretly) an attitude of superiority. Beware! You are greatly favored, and God has enabled you far above your contemporaries. He treasures you as a valuable servant of the Kingdom; He will keep you sharp, by disciplining you, because He loves you. He may not punish pride in one whom He has not selected for great service, but He definitely will punish it in one He favors. How so? By humbling us. Avoid the need for humbling by God! Be constantly aware that your superiorities are not natural -- they are supernatural talents bestowed on you by Our Lord.

Do not become impatient with others, who will take more time to grasp what you can see in a moment. Learn how to communicate on the level of your listeners -- be it high or low. And thank God for your quickness.

I say again, I see no evidence of pride in you -- it astonishes me to see patience and compassion in one so young. Hence the joy I mentioned earlier.

Jesus Christ probably did not have a Bar Mitzvah ceremony -- we just don't know -- but for 3,000 years, the age of thirteen has marked the transition from the innocence of childhood to the age of accountability. "Innocence" of a child does not mean he doesn't sin. It means he is not necessarily aware of the difference between Good and Evil.

"Today I have become a man." Not an adult! In the Bible, a man reaches the "age of majority" at twenty years -- the age when he is eligible for war and taxation.

We can be sure that when Jesus turned thirteen, Joseph pronounced a special blessing on Him, and praised God for relieving him (Joseph) of responsibility for his son's actions. This is what the Bar Mitzvah came to represent -- still under your parent's authority, but now responsible, and accountable to the whole community, for your own actions.

It is a sad truth, that a man's brain does not fully develop before his early twenties. Until that time, there is a disconnect. Consequences which are obvious to an older person, are not obvious to a teenager. It is also a sad truth, that a man reaches his peak of sexuality at age 18. Before he has a complete brain.

I tell you in all honesty, that I committed my worst sins, hurt the most people in the deepest imaginable ways, before I turned 20. I did not come to Jesus until 1973, when I was 25 years old. Believe me -- "My sin is ever before me." David prayed "Remember not, the sins of my youth," but in the same psalm, he agonized over his youthful sin, even as, at age 72, I do now.

And now, some useful things that have stuck with me over the years:

Your Great, Great Grandfather Howard used to say "Live and learn, Jeff. Most people only live."

"If you have only the bare necessities, rejoice -- you lack nothing." -- Pelagius

Always live well below your means. Never pay more for any necessity, in order to gain status from it (a house, a car, clothes, an education).

I wish I never drank alcohol. I regret using cannabis in my youth. If I had not killed so many of my brain cells early on, maybe I could have cured cancer, or landed a man on the sun...

I love you, Josiah. Enjoy your day!

Grampa Jeff

6/30/2020